It’s crazy to me that I used to be able to play like this back in my prime in 2016. I’ve been playing guitar for about 18 years with the exception of the past 3 inconsistent years where I wasn’t as interested or committed anymore. I barely even picked up a guitar all of last year and I haven’t written a new song since winter of 2017 when I put out my last EP.

I used to dream of a career in music as a recording artist or session guitarist at a recording studio. I used to be so obsessed with writing and recording and publishing my own music over the years and have even recorded demos for a bunch of my friends’ bands. But somewhere along the way all of that fell to the side and it didn’t seem like a feasible career for me anymore. Due to my obsession with being as productive as possible with all of my design projects, I inadvertently began seeing playing guitar and writing music as a “time-waster” and something that would slow my momentum down. Seeing as though my primary career was that of a designer, I felt as though I should put all of my focus on that.

And ever since I made that decision, I subconsciously started viewing playing music as a waste of time because I just couldn’t come up with melodies and I wasn’t allowing myself the time needed to actually write good music. I wanted results immediately and my inability to write anything good forced me to see it as something I disliked more and more.

There’s no real point to why I wrote all of this. I guess I’m just trying to rationalize in my mind that it’s okay to take a step waaay back and return to where it all started for me.